“The custom of giving money as a wedding present is a long-established tradition in many communities. Even at those weddings where most guests give presents, close relatives and intimate friends of the bride’s or groom’s parents sometimes prefer to give money. To set maximums or minimums on a sum given as a gift is against every principle of etiquette. The sum you give is in no way supposed to help pay for the wedding and should never be based on the presumed cost per head.

A check given before the wedding is made out in the bride’s maiden name if the couple have opened a joint account, it maybe written to both the bride and groom. Occasionally a grandparent or godparent may intend a gift especially for the groom, and may make the check out to him alone. A check to be presented at the reception (as is the custom in some communities), may be made out to the bride’s married name if she is taking his name as her own, or to the couple jointly.”

Etiquette by Emily Post

“It used to be considered obligatory to send a gift, even though you could not attend the wedding.  This is still true when the principals are friends whom you see from time to time, or who live nearby.  In the days when that rule was made, people did not move around as they do today, and invitations were sent only to those within a reasonable distance.  Today people often send invitations to their entire list of acquaintances (perhaps using a Christmas card list), not thinking about the obligation they impose.  So, if you live in California and receive an invitation to a wedding in New Jersey from people you haven’t seen in ten years, don’t send a gift.

If you are a customer, a client or a patient of someone you meet only professionally, and you have never met the bride or groom, don’t send a gift.  The bride’s parents should have sent you an announcement instead of an invitation - carrying no obligation - and you are thus excused from having to send a present.

If you receive an invitation to both the wedding and reception from friends whom you see each year.  This does not mean that you should not send a gift to a bride whose family you will see in the near future, even though you are at a distance when the wedding takes place.  For example, the daughter of people you see every summer during your vacation, who has grown up with your children, gets married in December.  The fact that you are hundreds of miles away does not relieve you of the responsibility of sending a gift.  ”

Ettiqutte by Emily Post

Alright, obviously nobodies perfect.  I have an extremely oily skin and most folk believe this is a blessing, not.  Not so long ago  I was fortunate enough to visit Las Vegas,  after the 2nd day my face was really getting dry.  Could this be happening to me, impossible.  By the 3rd day I started to look like a prune.  The humidy, the one that I curse every day, helps my skin look more fresh.  Humidy is after-all not such a bad thing, at least there is one great factor.  Now I understand why folk retire to Florida. Moisturize twice a day or, live in Florida?

Woohoooooo, something to look forward to after this crazy day.  A fresh shower woke me up again, some fresh hip clothes set the tone, and a knock on my front door was the beginning of the evening.  It was my other 2 girlfriends ready to go out, eat and vent.  

 We arrived at this fantastically hopeful, a little European (my friends told me it was more Miami or West Coast), contemporary decorated restaurant called Table.  The one- man-show musician was exceptional, great music set the tone for the evening, the drinks were fabulous needless to say the cuisine was inviting.

 However, the best part of the evening was, able to be yourself and talk freely amongst friends.  We talk about every subject under the sun including our younger freer moments (mine were pale in comparison), but it seemed to me a Bud (you have to realize that a Bud is an import to me, at local price) gave me the same effect.   I met some great new folk including the owner J…and our waiter was quite colorful.  The music got more festive and people got more relaxed the vibe was wonderful, to top off our evening we had to go pick up C’s car from the repair shop before midnight.

 Well, here we are in the wee hours of the night, under the interstate looking at this enormous warehouse  in total darkness, 3 nice girls in a luxury car.  I had this vision, looking at us  from above, like zooming out, it didn’t look good, dark, eerie, alone, it wasn’t the best part of town either.  D kept saying it reminded her of ”Adventures of “…some babysitting movie.  No-one was to be seen, C even dared to knock on a door, she quickly hopped back into the car while D sped off.  Phew…reminded me on my days in South Africa.

 All in all though, we felt fantastic afterwards, yes we robbed ourselves  of a few sleeping hours, and of course we would pay for it the next day, but what great therapy good friends are, you seem to sleep well that night knowing everything is going to be alright.  Girls night out…an absolute must.  I can make it again in 2 weeks on Wednesday night.